7 Steps to Take When You Feel Like You Are Lacking Confidence

Confident woman standing in street smiling
Repeated mistakes.
Drop the ball.
Failure.

Sometimes you just can’t seem to get it together. And for some, you stew over these missteps and errors. You start to feel inadequate, you start to feel less confident.

What do you do when you feel like you are lacking confidence?

Confidence is a key component in your day-to-day activities. If you are feeling less than confident, it shows. The way you act, behave, and even your posture. You project what you feel.

Luckily, there are some easy steps you can take to give yourself a boost.

  1. Celebrate small wins. You might have missed the mark on a recent big project, but don’t let that one misstep overshadow your smaller victories. Set little marks along the way and as you achieve them, be proud. Small wins along the way are building blocks and they can really boost your confidence.
  2. Revisit past successes. You aren’t always going to fail at all your endeavors. Want proof? Revisit your past successes. Look at your track record.
    Quote by Jenny Foss about confidence
  3. Learn from the failure. Increase competence. What did you learn from the experience? Great, now, how can you improve? Determining where you went wrong is ineffective if you do not learn and grow from it. Failure leads to success. You learn from mistakes and you learn about yourself. Top CEOs failed before they became successful. Does Bill Gates ring a bell?
  4. Clear the clutter. Get rid of hindrances. Messy workspace, procrastinating a task, constantly checking social media? Rid yourself of needless distractions and get to work. Stop making excuses.
  5. Dress nicely. Stand Tall. Your appearance has an impact. Not just on how others perceive you, but how you perceive yourself. One of our previous articles (Dressing For Success) spoke on just that. How you dress matters. And so, does your posture. Adopting a commanding posture can immediately help you feel confident and empowered. Stand tall. Sit up straight. Hold your head high.
  6. Empower yourself. Arm yourself with tools to improve. Read. Study. Learn from others. Gather as much as you can get your hands on to catapult you to the next level.
  7. Think positive. Good things cannot come from a negative mindset. You control your attitude. Get rid of negative outlooks. Envision great things that are yet to come.

Confidence definition from dictionary


What has been helpful for you? How can we help? Contact us at TheClarks.Consulting@gmail.com or connect with us on social media! We look forward to hearing from you.

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You Are A Brand. How Do You Want to Be Seen? You Are A Brand.

You Are A Brand wording in a gray box with pink background

Did you know you are a brand? An actual walking billboard advertising yourself. Eek!

Your personal brand is important.

This goes far beyond the way you dress. It is how you hold yourself. It is your lifestyle. It is who you associate with. It is what you post on social media. It is every nook and cranny. It’s things you might not even think about. It is how clean you keep your car!

According to Wikipedia: Personal branding is the practice of people marketing themselves and their careers as brands. While previous self-help management techniques were about self-improvement, the personalbranding concept suggests instead that success comes from self-packaging.

2 circles connected in the middle with the words "Your Personal Brand"Your brand matters because it is what you are projecting to the world. It is what you are telling people about yourself. It is what people think about when your name is mentioned. So, what do you want to be known for? What do you want to improve? What steps can you take to make a mark and developing your brand?

What You Can Do to Develop Your Brand.

First, we suggest setting a clear goal. Know exactly what you want and what you want to be known for. Do you want others to come to you for advice about finance? Do you want to be regarded as confident and a thought leader? What image do you want others to have of you and then find ways to make that happen?

Make it happen. Our next point. Once you have figured out what you want and who you want to be, do it. Stop making excuses. Make plans. We have found it helpful to have a list.  Also, give yourself time frames. Goals are merely words if no game plan is established.

In your face. Ok, maybe not in an obnoxious way, but don’t sit in the corner and keep to yourself. Start becoming an expert in your area of interest. And it is worth repeating, be aware of your online image. There is power in the world-wide web, and that power can ruin your image fast. Make sure you are projecting what you want to be known for. Be mindful of what you are posting.

Knowledge is power written in pink and black letteringKnowledge is power. Read. Study. Educate yourself. As mentioned before, become the expert. Please note, this does not say become the know it all. There is a difference. You don’t want to be that person who monopolizes every conversation. There is a lot to be learned by listening.

Rebrand. Never stop growing. Never stop learning. And if you continue to improve yourself, you will need to rebrand yourself. With growth comes necessary changes.

Dress the part. We said earlier that the way you dress is not the only part of your brand, but it does plays a large role. Make sure you are always presentable. It will just happen to be that day that you phone it in when your biggest client or opportunity comes up and you aren’t presentable.


Tell us what you think! TheClarks.Consulting@gmail.com.

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Career Moves I Wish I Would Have Known Then. 10 Tips that Work!

Drawing of business woman holding a clipboard. No face. In suit. Yellow background.

Three years ago, I started my career completely over. I literally started from scratch. I have learned so much over these last 3 years that I wish I would have known fresh out of college. Seems to me colleges, and high schools are missing some fundamentals in preparing young individuals for the real world, but that is a discussion for another time.

To keep this short and to the point, I have decided we should dive right in. So, here are 10 specific things I have learned these last 3 years that have made monumental impacts in my career.

10 Tips:

  1. Network. Do not get in a rut staying in your cubicle. Meet new people. Go to seminars. Attend workshops. Accept a happy hour invite. Utilize pockets of time to meet others and gain knowledge from their experiences. You never know where connections will take you.
  2. Read. Immerse yourself in current affairs, industry news, personal development, Oprah book club logo. Black circle with white "O" in middle. etc. Some of the wisest and most powerful individuals will tell you that reading is the gateway to growing yourself. Don’t believe me? Here are a few name drops: Oprah Winfrey, Bill Gates, Sheryl Sandberg, Warren Buffet. All avid readers.
  3. Interview. Find people you admire and ask them if they have time to meet with you and tell they why. There could be many reasons why you admire that individual but let them know why you would like to speak with them and have a list of questions ready. And always thank them for taking time out of their day to assist you in your growth.
  4. Try something new. Don’t think you are “qualified” to handle a project? Why not try? Volunteer to help with an initiative and learn. You will never grow if you don’t take on new adventures. Aspire for more.
  5. Put emotions aside immediately. Having a bad day? Leave it at the door. Everyone has a battle they are facing. Everyone is going to have a bad day but if everyone let that affect them, nothing would get done. This does not mean you need to be a robot, this just means work is not your personal soap opera.
  6. Be confident in yourself. You are in your position for a reason. Recognize your Confidence quote in black letters with orange background. amazing capabilities and use those to your advantage – every single day. And be proud of your hard work.
  7. Are we friends? You are not at work to make friends. You are not at work to sit around and gossip. Your job is not to be best liked for the yearbook. Be nice, be cordial, but remember, you are in a professional setting. There is a time and place for everything. And please know this, crying at work doesn’t get you empathy, it gets you a spot very low on the professionalism totem pole.
  8. Slow down. Unless you are an Olympic runner, slow down. Do it right the first time. Have all materials needed before pitching the idea. Proof read before sending the email. Gather all the facts before making a decision. And really take time to think of the outcome of those decisions.
  9. Handshakes. Never underestimate the power of the handshake.
  10. Don’t chew gum. No explanation needed.

Let me know what you think. I would love to hear feedback and other suggestions! TheClarks.Consulting@gmail.com.

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Women – Stop Saying “I’m Sorry”

Black and white comic drawing of woman winking and words saying "sorry not sorry"

“I’m sorry.” How many times a day do you think you say those two words? Ever stop to think about it? I am going to challenge you to a little experiment. Take notice of how many times you say you are sorry. I guarantee it you apologize for things you don’t even need to apologize for! I am serious. Try it tomorrow and report back.

Generally speaking, every time you say you are sorry, you are admitting a fault, right? You have made some sort of error that now warrants an admission of wrongdoing. But what about things that are just flat-out ridiculous to apologize for? Below is a list from Greatist of 7 things you should absolutely stop apologizing for and I agree with every single one of them:

  • Telling the truthwomen say i'm sorry too much
  • Your feelings
  • Appearance
  • Me time
  • Asking a question
  • Other people’s behavior
  • Not responding immediately to a text, call, or email
  • Circumstances you can’t control

Hey, if I accidentally bump into you while you have your drink in your hand and you spill it all over your shirt, I honestly do feel bad, and yes, I will say I am sorry. And if I have wronged you, I will own that. But apologizing for not having a great hairdo that day, no. And don’t even get me started on being made to feel guilty for having some me time. Do you know what message you are sending by always saying “I’m sorry?” You are saying to others that you are not confident, you are unsure, you are timid. Ugh.

By the by, would you like to know who the biggest culprit is in all these apologies? Women. It’s like women have this need to apologize, thinking that by doing so, people will like them better. Here’s the mentality: “If I say I am sorry, then it makes me look sincere and caring, and not too bossy, then I will be accepted and liked.” Heaven forbid women don’t play the dainty, polite, little lady, who sits quietly in the corner as to not disturb anyone. Amy Schumer nailed it in a sketch titled I’m Sorry. “For many women, our default is to apologize without even realizing it.” Which brings me to my earlier question: How many times a day do you think you say “I’m sorry?”

stop saying sorry

The flip side to this epidemic is it is fixable. You just need to rewire your way of brain a bit. Tweaks here and there. Make yourself aware. Listen to yourself in conversations. Replace “I’m sorry for bothering you, but…,” with, “When you have a free moment, can we speak?” Replace “I’m sorry.” Find other ways to communicate your message. Have some confidence in yourself!

No, you are NOT sorry.


Contact me at TheClarks.Consulting@gmail.com

 

 

Define Success on Your Own Terms

Define success on your own terms with peach background

Society Has Ideas

Society says you are successful if you have A, B, C and D. Basically, defining what success is for you and everyone else. How about defining success on your own terms?

What does it look like for you to be successful? What do you want to achieve for yourself and your personal satisfaction? To answer this, you will need to erase what has been ingrained in you for so long.

It Takes Thought

Everyone has a different idea of success, and that is great! That means there are an unlimited number of positive outcomes. What is important to figure out is, what is your idea of success is and why? Do you have a clear idea or are you comparing it to someone else?

Make things happen in three black stacked boxes with white background

Constantly looking at other’s success and gauging yours off that will lead to disappointment. Do you really want someone else to define it for you? To define your journey? You will never know how to achieve real success if it’s not yours. Admire others, but don’t use their ambition as yours.

So, what does it look like for you? How do you figure it out?

  1. Realistic. You must be realistic. You can dream, and please do! Just acknowledge what’s realistic and what is a once in a million chance. Side note, it is ok to want both.
  2. Yours. Make sure you are using your passions and not anyone else’s. Don’t allow someone to define what your path is.
  3. Time. Give yourself time to weave through the clutter but also make sure you set a timeline. Giving yourself time frames will ensure you stay the course and, it is proven that you will be much more likely to achieve your goal.
  4. In Your Face. Make sure you know what your success looks like and then make sure that is in your sight every day, literally. Cut out photos, create a Pinterest board, have a background on your laptop. Do what it takes so that you see your goals daily. Side note number 2; vision boards are widely effective. Ask any successful person. I guarantee you they have one.
  5. Expect Failure, More than Once. You are going to fail. Guess what, you aren’t the only one. Don’t believe me? Take a couple of minutes to read about others you know who weren’t an instant success.
  6. Don’t Compare Someone Else’s Phase. This is big. Just because Joe Bob has 3 homes and a private jet while you’re warming up your Lean Cuisine for dinner in your one-bedroom apartment doesn’t mean you aren’t successful.

Don't compare poster in black frame and white background

Know what else, start now. Begin anywhere. Do what you can.


Let me know what you think and share your stories! TheClarks.Consulting@gmail.com

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